Kane
Mike Mizanin
John Morrison
Tommy Dreamer
Shelton Benjamin

Unfortunately, this just flashes by too quickly. Dreamer is the first one to go, courtesy of Kane, who ironically also eliminated Dreamer in last year's Rumble. Benjamin takes out Kane pro tempore with his inverted bulldog DDT (Straight to Hell for TNA fans), but the tag champs turn on Benjamin, leaving Kane time to recover. He tosses Benjamin over the top, but Shel hangs on to the top rope for dear life, a la Shawn Michaels in 1995. Kane dumps Miz & Morrison, but Benjamin has the last laugh, scissoring Kane's head and dumping him over while vaulting back into the ring to end it. Winner: Shelton Benjamin.

Benjamin cut a short promo afterward, claiming this was just the first step, with the Rumble next on Sunday.

Match 2: Kelly Kelly vs. Layla El vs. Lena Yada (best body challenge) After Lena inserted herself into a dance contest two weeks ago, the former members of Extreme Expose might be willing to put differences aside to school the newbie. Smackdown's Jonathan Coachman serves as the MC, which should ensure a fair & honest outcome. Unfortunately, Coach gets off on the wrong foot when he mis-speaks and says the dance contest took place last week. Worse, when the music starts, the girls have no idea who's supposed to lead off, so Coach has to prompt Layla. I feel sorry for Layla, to tell you the truth. She has the most talent of this trio, yet because she's a heel, she gets no love from the fans at the University of Virginia. The result, then, is a landslide. Winner: Kelly Kelly.

Kelly has no time to celebrate, as Lena & Layla confront her and knock her down with a double-team faceplant. Jealousy rears its ugly head again.

Match 3: Kofi Kingston vs. David Owens After all the hype, Kingston finally makes his debut, the first WWE/ECW wrestler to hail from Jamaica. Protracted squash. Owens gets standard rent-a-jobber offense, but things got a little bit sloppy midway on a botched crossbody for a near fall, as Owens dropped down too early to take the move. Kingston hit a running bombs away splash in the corner, then a double-leg legdrop, before finishing Owens with a front enziguri, more like a bicycle kick, really, to the head. Winner: Kofi Kingston.

Edge is helping Chavo Guerrero prepare backstage, and Chavo's Aunt Vicki wheels in. Yes, unfortunately, she still has the wheelchair. She mentions that the family is here, which in this case means the Edgeheads are lurking around. I've a feeling, however, that CM Punk may have some backup of his own.......

Royal Rumble history by the numbers. Lots of factoids that have been discussed time and again over the years.

Joey & Tazz run down the Rumble card.

Backstage, ECW GM Armando Estrada is conferring with "La Familia" (Edge, Vicki & Chavo Guerrero) as we go to break.

Here's Colin Delaney again. Do we need to revisit a month's worth of pain again?

Match 4: Colin Delaney vs. Great Khali (w/Ranjin Singh) Squashola! What is the point of sending Delaney out against one monster after another? Delaney gets no offense at all. Khali chops him in the head before ref Mike Posey can even call for the bell to start the match. Tree slam should be the end, but Khali, having seemingly no idea that Delaney can't continue, clamps on the vise grip. Posey, seeing the blank expression in Delaney's eyes, calls for the bell to end it. Winner: Great Khali.

As shown at the top, we're reminded of how Chavo gained his title shot, through the illegal assistance of Edge.

Match 5: CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero (w/Edge)(ECW title) Chavo has the deck stacked in his favor with his aunt Vicki in attendance, Edge in his corner, and the Edgeheads lurking in the shadows. Edge is sitting with Joey & Tazz for a 2nd week, and Tony Chimel informs us that the match is now no-DQ, thanks to a last minute deal between Vicki & Armando Estrada. With the lack of time left in the broadcast, it's going to be quick and painful. Punk takes advantage of the stip and starts uncovering a turnbuckle, but Chavo finishes that job. Late in the match, the 'buckle comes into play, as Chavo is hot shotted onto it, and Punk hits the Go To Sleep. However, Edge leaves the desk and spears Punk. Chavo crawls over, and it's over. Winner & new ECW Champion: Chavo Guerrero.

Vicki & the Edgeheads come out to join the celebration. Vicki leaves the wheelchair to walk into the ring, but the chair is brought in so she can sit. I don't see the need to have the chair.